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Apr 28 2014

How to Love a Cat

I’m sure if you have a cat, you’re occasionally wondering, what does my cat need from me? Maybe you’re thinking of adopting a cat and you want to know what type of interaction is necessary from your cat since you won’t really need to take it for walks. Well, today Waffle and I came up with a short list of things your cat needs from you at any given moment.

Waffle Loves Hockey (hats)
  1. Kitty needs you to pet him.
  2. Kitty needs you to scratch right there.
  3. Kitty needs you to stop scratching so much and just leave it to petting.
  4. Kitty needs you to stop right now. You’re annoying her.
  5. Kitty needs you to leave him alone.
  6. Kitty needs you to put more food in her dish, 27 kibbles isn’t nearly enough to last the next two hours until dinner.
  7. Kitty needs you to turn the faucet so it drips just enough for him to drink out of.
  8. Not that much! That dribble of water is way to fast and scary.
  9. Kitty needs you to open the door so he can come in, going potty alone is dangerous.
  10. You must let kitty play with your fish, hamster, guinea pig. If you don’t, kitty will scratch up your carpet.
  11. Kitty needs you to let her double check for tuna on your sandwich. The tuna is hers, not yours.
  12. Kitty needs you to sit perfectly still so he can sit on your lap.
  13. No really, don’t even breathe, you’ll disturb Kitty.
  14. Kitty needs you to stop typing on the heater bed. That’s his heater bed. 
  15. Kitty needs you to quit tickling her face with that feather.
  16. Thank you, now let Kitty play with the feather by herself. 
  17. Kitty needs you to fill that cup fuller so she can get some juice out of it.
  18. If you don’t Kitty will just tip it over. 
  19. Now you have juice all over your floor.
  20. Kitty isn’t going to clean that up, are you kidding her? Juice is gross.
Did I miss anything? Leave a comment if you think there’s anything else your cat just needs to have to survive.

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1 ping

  1. 5 Things Friday! Moving Edition » Everything Isn't Normal

    […] things cats are trying to tell humans, but then I got carried away and wrote an even better list of cat nonsense earlier this […]

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